


Choices

by corys_the_bosmer



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Because nothing after the kiss is canon anyway, Braime - Freeform, Canon until 8x04, F/M, Fluff, Romance, Tarth, jaime is alive, the happy ending we deserve
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-05-14 21:09:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19281223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/corys_the_bosmer/pseuds/corys_the_bosmer
Summary: The war against the dead and the war for the crown are over. Jaime and Brienne are living on Tarth, and Jaime reflects on some of the choices that led him there.





	Choices

Everything was burning. Jaime tried to take a breath but smoke filled his lungs, making him cough and splutter. Through the flickering green flames he could see a single figure at the other end of the throne room. He made his way forward, desperately trying to blink the ash out of his eyes.

The figure was lounging on the Iron Throne, watching the wildfire with a smile of delight.

Over the roar of the flames and the creaking of the stonework, Jaime could hear them laughing, delirious with joy at the sight of the destruction all around them.

 _This isn’t possible,_ he thought, _I killed you._

He reached for the hilt of his sword as he got closer, a terrible sense of familiarity gnawing at his stomach.

The figure on the throne turned to look at him. It wasn’t the Mad King after all. It was his sister. Cersei’s eyes were wild, her lips pulled back in a manic grin.

“Jaime,” she called to him, beckoning him closer.

“What have you done?” Jaime asked, horrified.

“They wanted to take my throne from me, but I wouldn’t let them.”

She walked towards him, moving more quickly than he would have thought possible.

“I knew you’d come back to me. We belong together.”

“No,” Jaime shook his head, trying to back away.

“We came into this world together, we’ll leave it the same way.”

“No,” Jaime said again, more firmly this time.

She grabbed for him with long, claw-like nails.

“Let go of me.”

He tried to push her away. He didn’t want to hurt her, but the thought of touching her repulsed him.

“Stay with me, Jaime. We can die together.”

“No!”

She seemed super-humanly strong as she held on to him. The wildfire blazed in her eyes and she looked utterly mad.

“I love you. You love me. We belong together.”

She dug her nails into his skin, trying to force his head down to kiss her, and in that moment Jaime wondered how he had ever found her beautiful.

“No! Leave me alone!”

He managed to get one of her hands off him and turned to leave.

“You want to go to her, is that it? You’d rather be with that big ugly bitch than with me?”

Jaime tried desperately to pull away from her. The roar of the flames got louder and somewhere in the distance he heard part of the building collapse.

“If I can’t have you then neither can she.”

Cersei looked towards something in the middle of the throne room. Hidden by the smoke, Jaime hadn’t noticed it before. Someone was suspended from the ceiling, their arms outstretched by two chains as a fire burned under their feet.

Even in the flickering green light he recognised the deep blue armour and pale blonde hair.

“Brienne!”

He pushed Cersei to the floor and rushed towards her.

“Jaime!”

Brienne’s cry was desperate and afraid.

“I’m coming!” Jaime called to her. “I’ll save you!”

He raced to where one of the chains was attached to the wall and reached to undo it. But as he did so he realised that both his hands were gone, leaving only bloody stumps behind. He choked out a sob as a feeling of absolute helplessness crashed into him.

“Brienne!”

All he could do was call out her name.

“Jaime!”

Brienne’s cry turned into an awful high-pitched scream as the flames licked higher.

Jaime fell to his knees, hopeless, defeated. He could only watch as the woman he loved burned and his sister stood over him, a triumphant sneer on her face.

“I told you no-one walks away from me.”

* * *

“Jaime.”

A distant voice came to him through the smoke and the screams. He tried to stand and move towards it, but his legs wouldn’t work.

“Jaime.”

He heard the voice again, closer this time, and felt a hand on his shoulder, calm and reassuring. With another sob he pulled himself forwards, and his eyes flew open to find himself sitting up in bed, the covers tangled around his legs and Brienne beside him, looking at him with concern.

“Brienne.”

He managed to croak out her name, his throat aching and dry. He reached out to touch her, almost hesitantly, not sure if she was real or not. His right hand was still gone, but his left was there and relief flooded through him as he stroked her face.

“It’s alright, Jaime. I’m here. You were dreaming, that’s all.”

She gently brushed his sweaty hair away from his forehead.

“It felt so real.”

“It wasn’t. It was just a dream. And it’s over now.”

“I saw you die,” he whispered, the sound of her screams still echoing in his mind.

“It was just a dream,” Brienne said again. “It wasn’t real. I’m here. I’m alright.”

Jaime covered her hand with his, squeezing it tight.

“It was Cersei. Everything was burning.”

“She’s gone, Jaime. She can’t hurt you. She can’t hurt anyone anymore.”

She cupped his face in her hands.

“I’m here. You’re here. We’re home. We’re safe. No-on is going to hurt us.”

Jaime looked around at the grey stone walls and soft blue curtains of their bedchamber in Evenfall Hall. It was still dark, but the remains of the fire gave enough light for him to see.

He looked back at his wife and nodded, trying to calm his breathing.

Brienne put her arms around him and Jaime held her tight, burying his face in her neck. He breathed in the scent of her warm skin, comforting and familiar.

After a moment he let go, still holding her hand in his.

“I’m sorry I woke you.”

Brienne gave him a small smile.

“It’s alright. I have bad dreams too.”

Jaime knew it was true. They’d both seen so many horrors it sometimes amazed him that they managed to sleep at all.

Brienne lay back on the bed.

“Come on,” she said.

Jaime lay down next to her, curling close with his head on her shoulder. Brienne kissed the top of his head, stroking his hair soothingly. He rested his hand between her breasts, feeling her heart beat.

They remained lying like that as Jaime watched her breathing gradually slow as she fell asleep.

But every time he closed his eyes the image of his sister laughing madly amid the flames came back to him, and it was almost dawn before he was able to sleep again.

* * *

The next day passed in a blur for Jaime. He and Brienne had a few meetings to attend, mostly matters concerning the day to day running of Evenfall Hall, and some shepherds from the northern hills worried about bandits stealing their sheep.

Lord Selwyn had been happy to step aside and let his daughter and new son-by-law take charge of things, and Jaime was happy enough to do it. But by the time they sat down for their evening meal he wasn’t sure he’d heard a word that anyone had said to him all day. Smoke and green flames and his sister’s cruel smile kept flashing across his mind, and each time they did he felt his heart start to race.

He was rubbing his eyes, trying to relieve the dull ache in his head when he noticed Brienne watching him. He knew that look all too well. She was concerned, but trying not to let him see it.

Jaime took her hand and smiled reassuringly.

“I’m alright,” he told her. “I just need a good night’s sleep.”

But when they settled down in bed that night, Jaime found that he couldn’t sleep. Or maybe he didn’t want to sleep, afraid of his dream returning again.

He felt restless, but he tried not to move around too much, not wanting to disturb Brienne. But no matter how he lay he couldn’t get comfortable. He dozed fitfully, only to wake again with a knot in his stomach and a tightness across his chest.

Eventually Jaime saw the pale light of morning start to creep in around the curtains. He could hear the wind outside, and he was tempted to put on a warm cloak and go for a walk, thinking the fresh air would clear his head.

Brienne stirred beside him. She’d be awake soon, and Jaime remembered a promise he’d made to himself months ago in Winterfell.

The weeks they’d spent there together had been some of the happiest of Jaime’s life. Once the armies had departed there had been little to disturb their peace. It had been all too easy to forget about the war in the south as they’d spent each day and each night together, making up for all the time they’d lost when they’d been apart. Jaime had been content, for the first time in a long while.

But it hadn’t lasted for long. News of Daenerys’s losses had reached them, and Jaime was suddenly reminded of the reality of what was happening.

After many sleepless hours he’d decided that he had to do something, though he hadn’t been sure what. He’d slipped out of their bed and dressed as silently as possible, gathering his things and preparing to leave.

He’d been about to walk out the door when he’d remembered what Brienne had told him about always putting another piece of wood on the fire to keep it going. He’d selected a small log from the pile and carefully set it in the hearth, then sat down on a chair, watching it to make sure it caught.

Jaime had lost track of how long he’d sat there, staring into the flames, knowing he should stand up but unwilling to do so.

He’d heard Brienne move in the bed behind him and her voice, confused and sleepy.

“Jaime? What are you doing?”

He hadn’t been able to answer, every explanation dying in his throat.

“Why are you dressed? Where are you going?”

“Kings Landing,” he’d managed to say, finally looking over his shoulder at her.

Brienne’s expression had changed from confusion to fear and sadness.

“Why?”

“I have to stop this. I have to try.”

He’d known the words had sounded ridiculous even as he’d said them.

“You don’t have to. You don’t have to die for this. Or for her.”

Jaime had stared at her for a long moment, as he’d tried to work out how to explain something that he hadn’t fully understood himself.

He’d walked over and sat beside her on the bed.

“She’s my sister,” he’d begun.

“I know. But you’re better than she is. You don’t have to give your life for her. You’re worth more than that.”

Not for the first time, Jaime had been over-awed by Brienne’s belief in him, something he was sure he didn’t deserve.

“I don’t want to leave you,” was all he’d been able to say.

“Then stay. Please.”

Looking into her eyes, he’d realised that she was fighting to hold back tears. He’d never seen her afraid before. In a flash he’d thought of everything they’d been through together: her concern for him when he’d lost his hand. The bath at Harrenhall. How she’d tried to fight a bear with a wooden sword. The day he’d given her Oathkeeper, and the day he’d told her it would always be hers. The way she’d stood up for him against Daenerys. Her smile the evening he’d knighted her. Each kiss. Each caress. Each and every moment they’d shared. He’d felt as if his life was balancing on the edge of a sword, and his next choice would decide which way he fell. Life or death. Future or past.

And he’d chosen.

Simply nodding, he’d put his arms around her, feeling her let out a long, shaky breath.

He’d got undressed again and got back into bed. Lying facing each other, Jaime had entwined his fingers with hers.

“I’m sorry,” he’d whispered. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Brienne had replied.

“I promise I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Brienne had given him a small smile, and squeezed his fingers in response.

_I promise I’ll be here every morning when you wake up, for as long as I live._

* * *

So far, he’d kept that promise.

* * *

It took a while for Jaime to get dressed that morning, tiredness making his fingers clumsy. Brienne must have noticed him struggling with the fastenings of his coat because she came over to help him. Jaime gave her a rueful smile.

“Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

She rested her hands on his chest, studying his face carefully.

“You didn’t sleep again last night,” she said. “Were you having bad dreams again?”

“No,” Jaime replied. “No dreams.”

He lent forward and kissed her cheek.

“I’m fine,” he assured her. “Just tired, that’s all.”

Brienne nodded, accepting his explanation, bit Jaime knew she was still worried. It warmed him to know how much she cared about him.

“So who are we meeting this morning?” he asked.

“Ser Rolan Archyr. My father granted him some land on the west side of Tarth. He’s here to collect some papers.”

She gave his collar a final tug to straighten it.

“Do you want your hand?” she asked.

Jaime glanced over to where his golden hand was lying on top of a chest of drawers. He’d been wearing it less and less the longer he’d been on Tarth, only putting it on for important meetings. He knew Brienne had never cared about his stump, so there didn’t seem much point wearing it when it was just the two of them.

“No,” he said after a moment’s thought. “I don’t think I need it.”

They went downstairs to meet Ser Rolan. He was in his late forties, with a loud voice and laugh that reminded Jaime of Robert Baratheon. It was his first visit to Evenfall Hall, and he probably would have been happy to stay talking to them all day if they’d let him. It took a couple of hours before they were politely able to get him to leave.

Jaime knew that Brienne didn’t enjoy some of her duties as Lady of Tarth. She took them seriously, but after all his years in Kings Landing talking to other nobles came easier to Jaime than it did to her.

Brienne sighed with relief once Ser Rolan had left.

“Why don’t we ride up to Stonewick Point this afternoon?” Jaime suggested. “Just the two of us?”

“That would be nice,” Brienne smiled.

It had been a while since they’d been up there. The fierce winds that gave the Stormlands their name often made the cliffs treacherous places to walk. But the weather was calmer today, and Jaime still felt that some fresh air would do him good.

After their midday meal Jaime gathered a few things from their bedchamber before going to help Brienne saddle their horses.

They followed the trails up through the hills, cantering together where the grass was smooth and letting the horses pick their way over the rougher ground.

It took a while to reach the headland, but they were in no hurry. Not needing to talk much, they simply enjoyed each other’s company and the peace of the hilly countryside.

They dismounted on a flat bit of ground not far from the cliff edge and Brienne tethered the horses to a tree. Grey clouds scurried across the sky, making the sea look a deep, dark blue.

The rocky cliffs dropped sharply down to the sea. Jaime could hear the waves crashing into the small bays below. It had quickly become one of his favourite parts of the island, the coastline stretching out on each side and the rough waters of Shipbreaker Bay ahead. Brienne had told him that the view was even better once spring came, and Jaime was very much looking forward to seeing it.

Brienne joined him near the edge of the cliff. They stood together, their cloaks billowing in the wind.

“When the weather is warmer, we’ll have to bring some food and a blanket up here.” Jaime remarked.

Brienne smiled and nodded in agreement. There were already a few flowers starting to bloom, so maybe spring wasn’t far away.

Jaime squeezed her arm briefly before walking back to his horse. He got his golden hand out of the saddle bag and went back to where Brienne was waiting. She was watching him curiously, a slight frown on her face.

“Cersei had this made for me when I got back to Kings Landing,” he began. He saw Brienne’s frown deepen. They had barely spoken about his sister since her death. It wasn’t an easy subject for either of them.

“You know she never once told me she was sorry about what happened,” Jaime told her, lifting his right arm.

“She just gave me this instead, as if she was trying to fix me. I wasn’t her perfect golden knight anymore, and I think she hated that.”

He was quiet for a moment, contemplating the golden hand. The workmanship was exquisite, highly detailed and beautifully crafted. No doubt the finest that Lannister gold could buy.

“It’s typical of my family really,” he continued, almost more to himself than to Brienne. “Decorate something with shining gold and hope that no-one notices the ugliness underneath.”

Brienne didn’t say anything, just watched him quietly, letting him talk as he turned the hand over and over, feeling the weight of it.

Jaime took a couple of steps towards the edge of the cliff and threw it as hard as he could. He didn’t hear it land, not sure if it had fallen in the sea or hit the rocks below.

He let out a deep breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding.

Brienne slipped her left arm through his right.

“Feel better?” she asked.

Jaime nodded. He felt as if a weight had been lifted from his chest.

They stood there for some time, watching the waves below and the gulls soaring on the wind until the sky started to darken.

“Shall we go home?” Brienne asked.

“Yes, let’s go home.”

Jaime smiled and reached up to brush a stray lock of hair away from her face before kissing her, soft and slow.

They walked back to the horses hand in hand, only letting go when they had to mount.

They rode back down through the hills as night was drawing in, until they saw the welcoming lights of Evenfall Hall ahead of them.

That night the feeling of contentment returned, and Jaime wasn’t troubled by dreams as he slept peacefully in the arms of the woman he loved.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first of a collection of short stories set on Tarth after s8 because we all know how Jaime and Brienne’s story should have ended. Full of fluff and romance and maybe some smut. ;)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it because I have plenty more ideas. xx


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